How does it feel? You lit it up blue, didn’t you? I told you about Autism Speaks and how their primary goal is a world without people like me in it and how they have degraded and threatened and ignored and sued and plagiarized autistic people and how they thought nothing of saying we are not fully human, that our families are not really living, can never be happy, and we are the reason. I talked to you when I didn’t have the energy or resources to speak. I wrote to you when I had other plans and more constructive work to do. I answered your questions. I was reasonably polite, though I don’t think that should be a requirement.
You lit it up blue. I heard you were there. You put on the t-shirt. You made a speech. You asked for my project’s brochure. You asked for the tablecloth with the logo of the institute for which I have so proudly worked. You took a client. You worked a table. You wore the puzzle piece on your lapel or your necktie. You walked around and said hello to your friends. You felt pretty good about yourself.
When you lit it up blue, you didn’t notice the power surge, the drain you put on public resources. You turned out the light I had kept on for you, the hope that what autistic people thought and believed and said might matter, at least to those who work beside us every day.
It wasn’t because you didn’t know better. You did.